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Self Care Friday Collection - December 2023-May 2024

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 Another collection of Self Care Friday emails.  December 1, 2023: This week, I just surpassed my goal of reading 40 books in 2023. I listen to most of my books on Audible because, frankly, I fall instantly to sleep as soon as I pick up an actual book. So I listen; in the car, or when I’m out running or walking the dogs. I like to learn when I read so I tend to choose true stories, or stories that are based on true stories, or memoirs. I would not have ordinarily been drawn to a book called “Serenity at 70, Gaiety at 80; Why You Should Keep Getting Older” (by Garrison Keillor), but the word, “serenity” hooked me, and it was on the “included with membership” list.  I’m not a glory days girl. Some people spend hours, joyfully reminiscing. Not me. I’ve enjoyed every stage of life even more than the prior. If I get to settle in to serenity when I’m in my seventies, I’m all for getting there. This book is fun to read with lots of humor, but on of his quotes stuck with me, as q...
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A Collection of Thoughts - April to November, 2023

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  My life since March, 2023 has been something of a blur.  I have written many "Self Care Friday" messages in that time, but have only published a few.  For posterity's sake, I'm pasting some of them into this one post.  Enjoy, and take care of you.💖 Forgiveness, Scars, and the Separation of Church and State Some excellent kid quotables this week:  A parent requested that I speak to a first grader about how to deal with being bullied after some incidents at the Boys’ and Girls’ Club. We chatted for a minute about the situation and then I asked him, “have you told your mom and dad about all of this?” Kid: yes, bofe o’ dem. Me: And, what did they say about it?  Kid: They tode me to be mean back. But I dint. Me: No?  Kid: No. Becod I not mean. I nice.  Me: You are very nice. So, what did you do?  Kid: I forgaved them.  Talking to 4th grade about what to do to manage emotions when things go wrong. I explain that even when things seem to be ...
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Glimmers of Summer

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"What I did on my Summer Vacation;"  The classic back-to-school essay.  I think my summer vacation was not so much "what I did," but more, "what I was taught." To clarify, "what I was taught" does not necessarily mean, "what I learned." I'm starting to understand the implied lessons, but I don't always consciously recognize or remember the lessons, nor do I consistently use the knowledge I have gained.  The past (almost) three months living full time with my mother have been a lesson in patience, and letting go.  I recently read an article by Sue Hansard with the (UK) Alzheimer's Society. In referring to her own mother, Sue said, "She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, and so began our family's journey of discovery and enlightenment." Yes. Our Journey.  So,  here, in no particular order, are some of my insights as we travel further along this path. People who forget also remember.  Mum's short term...
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Time and Space and Everything in Between

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I think it's time for an update on our lives with Mum. Since August of 2022, things have been going very well down in Virginia. Anna moved to stay with her in August of '22.  The idea was to live rent free, while helping to take care of Gamma, saving some money, and paying off some of her bills.  It's been a very symbiotic relationship, and Anna has done a tremendous job. They have done a lot of walking, dog training, outings to wild areas and conservatories.  They have had regular meditation sessions, and done painting together.  The jigsaw puzzles have not been so appealing to Gamma, but we keep trying.   Gamma is losing her ability to converse effectively.  This is stressful for her, because she likes to stay in touch with her friends and family.  Fortunately, folks are doing their best to reach out to her, often. She is also not reading as much as she used to. Reading was always one of Mum's hobbies, but now she is struggling to remember what she h...
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Friendly Reminders...

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  I've had a few things on my mind lately. This morning, I sent a text to my brother, saying, "I need to have you consistently reminding me that I can do this."  You see, I frequently preach my " everything is figureoutable " mantra, but sometimes, the thing itself feels UNfigureoutable.  Sometimes, I bury myself in the what-ifs of the thing itself.   My mind has been bogged down with worries about various situations, how those situations are going to affect me, and plenty of self-doubt (hence the note to my brother). Anxiety filled days, chore-filled evenings, sleepless nights.  Another thing I said to my brother: "I tend to require situations to be in control in order for me to be OK. This situation is not, and I am not OK." As I've preached many times before to many others, most life situations cannot be controlled, and we must let go, let life happen, and learn to love what happens , in order to feel OK. I do like to have a plan.  I certainly c...
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