What's Working?

How can it only be a week since I last wrote?  Our situation seems to change from one hour to the next.  Last Friday seems like it was worlds away.  Two weeks ago we were at work, living our regular lives and counting the days until Easter break...  How ironic!  Even the kids are wishing they could be back at school!

After the last, surreal two weeks, I'm left spinning and speechless.  You've seen all the posts and read all the articles about how to cope, about staying positive, about making the best of what's going on in all of our lives.  I know you get it... I'm sure most of you have even found some benefits to this mandated slow down.  I know I have.  For one thing, there's been the extra time with my daughter.  Currently, my seventeen year old and I are both sitting at the dining room table;  I'm writing, and she's working on a set of hanging shelves that she's building for her bedroom.  It's really not all bad.

However, I'm finding that I don't have anything specific to write about today.  I'm not finding myself particularly inspired to share any one thing.  I think this is the result of the overwhelming nature of the situation that we all find ourselves in.  There's so much to think about;  this is an unprecedented situation, and we are all trying to find our way.  And, I believe we will, because I have a strong faith in the resilience of human nature. 

So, rather than attempting to be profound, I'm just going to share a few of the things that have been working for us.

 Rest.   OK, so it's not every day, but there are times when we're going to bed earlier than usual and getting up later than usual.  There's couch time, TV time, nap time, reading time, and kitten snuggle time.  The problem isn't a lack of sleep.  The problem is, that even though we may be feeling OK, this is stressful.  We're out of our routine, there's concern for our friends and family, there is uncertainty about what's going to happen in the next few months.  Every once in a while, I just feel suddenly exhausted.  We've been resting when we need to rest.

Nature.  Every day with the nature.  We've been getting out into the woods at least every other day.  Even when I don't get to get out into the middle of nowhere, I've got the morning runs.  Yes, it's dark, but you'd be amazed at the amount of nature that I can experience throughout a 90 minute run:  stars, the moon, a sunrise, the sound of a flock of geese, the spring peepers, the waking of the birds, a mysterious layer of mist, and, just the other morning, the light pillars!  Sometimes, nature will make me stop short, and everything disappears except for the miracle in front of me.  When I'm in the woods, I like to look for tiny things.  Tiny things amaze me.  Nature.  Eco-therapy.  It works. 

Reaching out and Connecting.  I talk to my mother on the phone every day, at least once.  Jimmy visits his mom every day, at least once. A Snapchat family group message keeps us amused, keeps us in touch with the adult kiddos, and keeps us in the mindset to pay attention to the little things that happen every day. I'm in touch with my brothers, perhaps more than ever, to keep tabs on the family and to make sure we are all doing OK.  I'm trying to check in with friends daily.  If there's one thing that a "quarantine" will do, it's remind you that it's the people that matter.  Hearing from the people I love makes every day manageable.

Trying new things.  We're fostering kittens, building shelves, getting creative with home workouts, trying new recipes (gnocchi is the new recipe of the day).  I even tried doing a headstand!  Trying new things and experiencing successes has really added value and purpose to this solitary time.

Letting go.  The most powerful and helpful little graphic that I've found and shared, is one that illustrates the difference between what I can control and what I can't.  If we are to survive this ordeal, we must be able to let go of the things we can't control, and focus on those that we can.  I can control:  My attitude, my exposure to media, finding purposeful use of my time, making healthy choices, my own family's rules for social distancing, how I respond and treat other people.  Being aware and deliberate about these things, and determined to let go of that which I can't control, has absolutely been the key to my being able to emotionally manage these last two weeks.

We've only just begun this journey.  Our family has only just begun to discover what works for us.  It's up to you to determine what works for you, and to be determined to not only survive, but thrive.
Remember to reach out and ask for help or support if you need it.  If you have no one to ask, you have me. 
We got this.

Take care of you.  💖 

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.