My View from the Top of the World

  The other day, I went over to talk to a group of high school students - future teachers - about emotional trauma, and trauma informed teaching strategies.  Towards the middle of the discussion, as we were moving in the direction of secondary trauma in caregivers, the kids were able to identify that they are, indeed, experiencing trauma, right now, every day.   You certainly are!  What trauma are you experiencing? "We're living during a pandemic." Yes. We. Are.   According to the American Psychiatric Association, trauma is "an emotional response to a terrible event."  Additionally, a "person may experience trauma as a response to any event that they find physically or emotionally threatening or harmful." Important to note:  individuals respond differently to different life events.  It seems like it should not need to be said, but it needs to be said:  Something that affects me might not affect you in the same way. So, with our curr...

  And on this World Kindness Day, 2020, There's not much more that needs to be said. Always stay humble and kind. Take care of those you love.  Take care of you. 💖

  Seven years ago today, I lost my first love.  Less than 48 hours after a catastrophic stroke, I held his hand, and whispered into his ear that he has been the best dad ever.  That afternoon, after Mum and I had returned from the hospital, I went for a run (as if that's not the weirdest thing ever - you come home from the hospital without your loved one, and you're expected to just carry on without them...) As I ran, I made up my mind that I would honor Dad, and make him proud by my actions every day for the rest my life.  "Be the things you loved most about the people who are gone..."  Dad was a lot of things.  He was a sports fan, a decent golfer, and a terrific chef. He enjoyed music of all kinds, from Beethoven to Elton John, to Alan Jackson, to Tina Turner.  He loved a good joke and often found his own the funniest of them all.  He was well traveled and appreciated everything that another culture had to offer - especially the cuisine, but al...

I've been watching my kids play sports for almost 20 years. There's a last time for everything, and this week, I sat in the bleachers as a parent for the very last time. My youngest's last volleyball game... They beat the crosstown rivals for the first time ever, in their last game ever. You could say it was the perfect conclusion to the story of a sports mom.   Between the two of us, Jimmy and I have played all kinds of roles in our kids' sports lives;  Coach, spectator, cheerleader, counselor, team mom, Booster President... I've learned all kinds of things about youth athletics, but the biggest thing of all is that typically, the sport is better for the kid than the kid is for the sport. To be fair, superstars do emerge from high school teams.  Of course, that's where the pros were bred.  By the numbers, though, only about 7% of high school athletes play in college, and less than 2% play for D1 schools.  As for going pro, the percentage of hig...

He came to my office for a moment.  He was having a bad morning, and was finding it hard to stay under control.  He had found himself in a spot of trouble. When he entered, he immediately fell prey to the soothing colors and soft furniture in my office.  We talked, 'though he never once made eye contact.  He told me that if he told the truth at home, then they wouldn't be mad at him. He told me how his older sibling blames him and tries to get him in trouble.  He told me that he likes to be with his daddy, and that his mommy is sick a lot.  After some moments of quiet, he tilted his head to one side and asked, "Do mommies really cook?" He came to my office for a moment.  It was a moment that changed my week.   "Be kind to one another, for all of us are fighting a hard battle."  It's probably the quote I see most often shared on social media.  We all get it... but do we live it?    There are a hundred new stories like ...

By Friday, I will have talked to five hundred students about what it's like to come back to school during a global pandemic.  My big take away has been this:  Our younger kids may seem unaffected, but they're not.  They're watching, they're listening, and there are lots of thoughts spinning around in those young minds.  As parents and teachers, it's going to be helpful to have some understanding of these thoughts as more time passes and the pandemic progresses.   Allow me to enlighten you... I decided that I would survey the 4th and 5th graders to get some insight as to how they are feeling about being back to school. It was my intent that the kids be totally honest, so students were not required to include their names on their surveys. Below, I'll share with you the questions, the most common answer, and an answer to ponder. 1.  How I feel about being back at school:     Most common answer:  Happy, excited, don't like the masks.   ...

  I dealt with a situation, recently, that really forced me to stop. And think.  It was one of those moments that could have got the better of me had I allowed it to.  I was actually proud of myself, because, in this instance, I intentionally decided how I was going to frame the problem in my mind.  I decided to make it work in my own favor.   I don't mean to be cagey and vague.  Suffice it to say that I was forced to reckon with an old friend's priorities, and their priority wasn't me.  And, of course, none of it is a simple as it sounds, but when you reach out to reconnect with a human, and they do not appear to want to reconnect, it can send a little shock wave through you, as it did for me.  Once I recovered from the initial shock, I decided to release myself from the guilt I had personally experienced for allowing the friendship to lapse.  And - now this is important - I decided that it was a good thing for me to know where I stand ...